It's a joy to know writers can create books as amazing as Brandon Sanderson's Firefight. The structure of the story is superb, along with the characterization, dialogue and the wonderful twists in the plot. And with any book, it's fun to see writers when they play with English like it's their favorite toy. In this series, Brandon has established a running joke about bad metaphors. Supposedly, the protagonist, David, is really bad at making metaphors, but it definitely takes a master writer to make metaphors this horrible. Here's some of my favorite examples:
"Prof could LOOM when he wanted to. Like a gravestone about to topple on a sprouting flower."
"Marco was a short guy with light brown hair so curly it looked like he'd stapled moss to his head."
"I needed to say something. Something romantic.
'You're like a potato!' I shouted after her. 'In a minefield.'
She froze in place. Then she spun on me.
'A potato,' she said flatly. 'That's the best you can do? Seriously?'
'Listen. You're strolling through a minefield, worried about getting blown up. And then you step on Something, and you think, 'I'm dead!' But it's just a potato. And you're so relieved to find something so wonderful when you expected something so awful. That's what you are to me.' p.174
[talking about a type of gun]
"Always jamming. And about as accurate as a blind man pissing during an earthquake."
"Wow..." I breathed.
She frowned at me.
"That was a great metaphor!" p.177
And some of my other favorite quotes that have nothing to do with metaphors:
"My only real experience with girls had been Megan; how was I supposed to react to a girl who didn't immediately seem like she wanted to shoot me?" p.155
"Oh, thank you,' I thought, feeling an overwhelming sense of relief. Dancing was stressful--but murderous demigods, those I could deal with." p.150
"This time, when she'd pointed the gun at me, she'd flicked the safety on. If that wasn't true love, I don't know what was." p.179
I hope you enjoy reading Brandon Sanderson's book, Firefight, book two in the Reckoners trilogy. You can purchase a copy here, on Amazon:
http://www.amazon.com/Firefight-Reckoners-Brandon-Sanderson/dp/0385743580/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1422087712&sr=8-1&keywords=firefight+by+brandon+sanderson
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